The Letters
by Greye Granger
Summary: Bella has lived a life alone until one day she begins receiving love letters addressed to someone else. When she comes in contact with the man who wrote them, who is far away, will she help him find her? Will they come to learn the truth, and in turn, fall in love with each other? AH-MA
1. Prologue

**ATTN: This IS an Edward/Bella love story. Do not be discouraged ;) I have my plans. Review away and let's get this story popular!**

**I want to thank my BETA, BethAnn for being amazing and incredibly helpful. Also a thanks to my perfect banner maker, Mist.**

**I OWN NOTHING TWILIGHT. That is all Stephenie's lovely work. I do however, Own this cute little love story!**

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**Prologue**

_Dear Tanya, June 28, 2012_

_This is my first letter to you, and I am so very sorry that it has taken me this long to write. When you're in another world, you tend to forget about time. We actually didn't get any mail service until this week, so it has been impossible._

_First off, I miss you. I am safe and not a moment goes by that I do not think of you. How is Grace doing? I cannot imagine how big she is now. I miss her kisses. And yours..._

_I know you must be curious as to how things are over here, but I cannot give much away unfortunately, my dear. It is devastating everywhere you look. Of course, that is why I am here, though, right? I have finally begun to feel like I am helping things._

_I pray that you are not still angry with me for going. I did not have a choice, my love. It is what I do, what I was born to be. You knew that from the beginning. Each night I sit by candlelight and think of you and how much my heart aches for your touch once more. It will come again, soon. Visions of your beauty race through my mind more often than not. The things I would touch, kiss, and hold if only I were next to you. Wait for me, my Tanya. We will have the life you have always wanted. I made you that promise. I have still kept it. I hope you have kept yours as well._

_With all of my love, my heart, my being,_

_Edward _

**November 3, 2012**

I read his good-bye, written in perfect cursive a dozen times before placing the letter down on the table in front of me. I felt ashamed, like I had trespassed into someone's heart. I had no right, no permission, no idea. The letter haunted me. It was begging me to read it each time I passed it sitting securely sealed on my coffee table for two weeks. I could not help it. I opened it. I would some day pay for this, I knew. I picked the letter back up and got a scent of a musky sand smell. The paper was thick and the pen ink was a navy blue. My mind shot back to Tanya. I had no idea who she was, but I was insanely jealous of her. And Grace? maybe Grace is their daughter? I thought about calling my realtor to get in contact with the old owner, but she always told me that a man owned this house, not a woman. It was a man that put it up for sale. If I had not recently decided to rent this house, I would have never received the best love letter I had ever seen. If only it was addressed to me. This man, Edward, did not use any last names, so that made finding this woman even harder. Although, it is possible that he got the house number wrong. Maybe it was for a neighbor. Shame began to burn in my stomach again. I would try my best to find this, Tanya. Not for me, but for this man that could write so beautifully that it broke my heart.


	2. Chapter 1

**Okay, I have gotten a lot of story favorites and some reviews just in the few hours it has been since I first posted to this story! You guys make my day, so I will give you Chapter 1. It is a chapter to sort of set the bar and give some information into Bella's life. Enjoy!**

**-S**

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**Chapter 1:**

**A Love Letter**

My days as an architect were always filled full with things to do. That comes in handy when you're a lonely person by nature. Lonely people either sit and wallow, or are non-stop busy. Thankfully, I was a busy one.

I graduated at the top of my class and signed on with a firm that was stable and fairly well known. Stability is a must have for me now that I can provide it for myself. I made decent money for a twenty-five year old, too. I was good at my job. My car was reliable and paid for and I just got into my first house. Luckily, I signed a lease agreement that was rent to own. That way, if something drastic changed, I wouldn't be stuck with it. I loved the house. I had a lot of plans for it, too. It was out in the country, but not so far away from civilization that I was cut off from the world. I had always wanted to live in the mountains, so when the job opportunity came about, I took it without question. Desperately, I was trying to start my life, but there were still some things missing.

Love wasn't something that came easily to me. I had dated some in college, but nothing ever got too serious. All those men seemed to be missing something, too. I could never place what it was, so I just kept searching. I wasn't a virgin, but I felt like I might as well be with how long it had been since someone had touched me. Although, sex was no big deal to me. That one guy that got my virginity didn't deserve it, but it wasn't like I put up a fight. I needed to know what all the hype was about. Did I find out? No, not even close. So, again, I continued searching. It was an endless tunnel for me in this life and all I wanted was for someone to shed the light to end all darkness. I got a taste of it once. A brilliant light shined through a thick curtain of black, hurting my eyes. I welcomed it. It was invigorating. It was of course, the love letter that burned in my pocket with each step I took. I was aching to read it again. Although, I could recite it by now.

I shook my head, and looked back to the mirror in front of me in my large bathroom. I felt decent enough to go over to my best friend's house for the evening. It was a Saturday ritual that started when I graduated from college. If anyone could make sense of this, it was Penelope. Quickly, I applied a little more mascara. My long auburn hair was down and curled and it tickled my arms. Winter was fast approaching, and it had me thankful for having long hair. My alabaster skin practically glowed in the dark, but there was no getting around that. The freckles that covered my skin lightly were the only color my skin new. I put my make-up bag away and pulled on my favorite pair of jeans. My green sweater looked too big for my frame, but it was comfortable. If I had any sort of boobs, it would fit perfectly. I chuckled to myself and headed downstairs to leave for Penelope's.

My car was still warm inside from when I had gotten home from work. I didn't always work on Saturday's, but I was desperate to finish our current building project. The new amphitheater would attract a lot of tourists, not that this town needed anymore of those. I drove down the driveway and caught sight of the mailbox. I had somehow forgotten to check it today. Since the love letter came, I was checking the mail as soon as the mailman pulled up to deliver it. I stopped the car in front of the box and opened it. Of course it was stocked full of adds, new bills, and clothing magazines. I really needed to end a lot of this junk mail. I closed the box lid and threw the mail onto the passenger seat. It spread out loosely and when my peripheral caught sight of an odd looking stamp, I slammed on the breaks just before I was in the street. My hands shook as I reached over to grab the letter out from underneath the recent issue of Victoria's Secret. Like the first letter, it was addressed to, "My Tanya," and from, "Edward C." The letter sat in my hands heavy with love. It weighed down like I was holding a bowling ball instead. I wanted to throw it away, for fear that my heart could not take another. Sadly, most of me just wanted to rip it open and begin reading it right here, right now. After another long stare, I dropped it in my lap and hurried to Penelope's house.

There is always that one friend in life that you cannot do without. That friend that is always there no matter the time or cause. That friend that is your other half, and understands who you are inside and out. I had that friend in Penelope. Through high school, when I first met her as a sophomore, I was made fun of for being close to her. It hurt me then, but now I don't care what they say about me. It is her that I care for in that situation. I refuse to give anyone the opportunity to talk shit about her, and they would. A lot of students thought she was a bitch. So, if I was friends with her, I was insane. An outcast. But a lot of those students were just idiotic, so of course they got into trouble. It was just as hard for her as it was me to make and keep friends. Especially close friends. No one understood us until we met each other. I could see how weird to some it may have been that I was so close to my english teacher. That made me the teacher's pet. She is thirty-two years older than I am. The age difference never mattered to us. In fact, somehow we always felt like we were the same age, whatever that age may be. I had been born in the wrong generation. She never judged me, and having someone who understands you is incredibly helpful in life.

Her house was amazing. It was full of antiques and everything was interesting and beautiful in its own way. I can remember the first time I came here when I babysat her daughter, Mae, my junior year of high school. Her daughter who was now away at her first year of college, was also a good friend of mine. Penelope had been married but the asshole cheated and left her. For the better, of course and Penelope was only happy that he was out of her and her daughter's life. She was the most romantic person I knew, so I knew that only she could help me with these letters.

"Bella," Penelope addressed with a smile.

"Hey, Penelope," I replied, with just as big a smile. I walked into the house and went straight for the living room. I plopped down lazily on her leather couch and sighed.

"What is it?" She asked with a smirk.

"I read the letter," I droned. I flung my arm across my face in shame.

"And?" She asked interested.

"And it was a love letter, Penelope!"

"Why are you so upset?"

"Because it wasn't my love letter."

"And you still haven't found Tanya?"

"No. I checked with all the neighbors and no one has ever known a Tanya, but they also did not know the previous owners of my house, either."

"Well, damn," Penelope said defeated. She brought me a glass of wine, matching hers, and sat down across from me. I swirled the white liquid around in the glass before taking a large sip. It burned.

"I should not have read it. I should have thrown it away."

"Why?"

"Because look at me! It has made me a mess. Not to mention that it is a felony."

"Oh, please," Penelope said with a laugh, "There was no harm. And you're only upset about it because it was so good and you don't know the man."

"I got another one today," I said quietly.

Absently, my hand went to my jacket pocket. It was almost instinctive.

"Another letter?" I nodded my response.

"Do me a favor?" I asked in a pleading voice.

"Of course."

"Read it to me?" Penelope smiled and held out her hand. I took the letter from my pocket and gave it to her. I watched as she carefully opened the envelope, and took out my heart in words.

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**I totally left you all hanging on purpose! Excited for more?**

**Review please! If I can some more favorites and more reviews I will post Chapter 2, today! And Chapter 2 has our Edward in it for the first time!**

**do you like the story banner?**

**what did you think of Penelope, and Bella's friendship with her?**

**xx**


	3. Chapter 2

**Good morning from the East Coast and Finally, some Edward!**

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**Chapter 2:**

**Torn**

_"Dearest Tanya, Sept 15, 2012_

_It saddens me to know that I have not received a reply letter from you, yet. Maybe it has gotten lost in the mail... I hope so._

_We got a computer last week, meaning there is somewhat of an Internet connection now. I have my laptop and am able to get on it at night. That means, we could begin to email each other. It is much faster than, "snail mail" ha ha._

_I worry that you have broken your promise. I could understand why if you did, I would just like to know if that is the case. We had problems, but I thought we could over come them. When I left, my heart was shattered. I thought I would never know happiness again. Time heals the heart, so I hope these past many, many months have begun to heal yours. I knew it was a toss up as to whether or not you would still want me. I did what I did and cannot go back on it now. But neither can you._

_Please, tell me if I am waiting for nothing. My heart burns as hot as the sun and it could use some coolant._

_Email me, my dear-_

_EC2002 _

_With my love,_

_Edward"_

My heart lifted as much as if fell at the sound of his words. Penelope held the letter for a long time before handing it back to me. His cursive was just as beautiful as the last letter, but it was written in black ink this time. The smell of sand met my nose.

"Wow," Penelope said in a sigh.

"Yeah, I know."

"You have to find Tanya."

"I know that, too." Penelope tilted her head at me in curiosity. "Is it bad that I don't want to, though?"

"No, Bella."

"Two letters. Only two fucking letters and my heart beats for them."

"Maybe this Tanya left him. Maybe..."

"No. His heart is hers."

"Are you going to email him?"

"I guess I should, right?"

"Maybe just ask for Tanya's last name so that you can give her the letters."

"Why do you think the letters came now?" I asked.

"I wondered that, too. I mean, it is November and the letters are months old. Maybe they were lost in the mail?"

"But you would think that the previous owners had put in a change of address, right?"

"Yes, but if the letters were lost, they may not have registered the address change once they had been found." I pondered that for a moment. Would it have been easier if the letters had gone to the right address instead of mine?

"And," Penelope continued, "His return address is strange. He is overseas somewhere."

"Do you think he is a soldier?"

"It is possible."

"I wish I could keep the letters forever,"

I admitted sheepishly.

"I know. Me too." I looked up to be met with Penelope's green eyes. She was a beautiful woman. At fifty-seven, she was easily mistaken for being forty-seven. Her hair was a light golden blonde color cut into a short bob. She had fare skin like me with light freckles. Unlike me though, her chest was her biggest asset while mine was the lower end.

"Thank you for reading it to me," I said quietly.

"I am glad that I did." She smiled and I felt better instantly. Not any less confused, worried, or ashamed, but better somehow because of her.

It was now just past eleven that night and I had been sitting in front of my Mac for almost an hour. I was torn. As much as I wanted to email him, I didn't want it. I was contemplating as I stared at the blank email in front of me. Then a different thought came to mind; if I was Tanya, wouldn't I want my letters from a man that loved me so? I would want whoever got my letters to return them to me. Would I be upset if that person had fallen in love with the words that were meant for me? My hands flew to the key board and began typing.

_Dear Edward,_

_My name is Bella, and it seems that I have been getting your letters that are addressed to Tanya. They only came in the mail a few weeks ago, and when I got the second one, I opened it to see if I could find any information that could help me find Tanya, to return them to her. I have lived in this house since the end of summer, and I apologize for this inconvenience. I would be glad to help you get them to her._

_-Bella_

I clicked the send button before I even hit the spell check. I knew that if I re-read it, I would change my mind. I chuckled when I realized that I had just admitted to committing a felony. Hopefully he would not turn me in. Suddenly, my eyes grew heavy. Before I could protest, I began dreaming of cursive writing and sand.

The office was always slow on Thursday's. Everyone knew that Friday was on the horizon, so they got lazy. Except for me. I was always working harder than most, and harder than I needed to sometimes. The upside of bombarding myself in architecture is that I hardly had time to think of my email. It had been five days since I sent it, and still no reply. Maybe he found her. Maybe he came home to her, I wouldn't know.

"Bella?" My head jerked up in surprise releasing me from my thoughts.

"Jacob, what's up?" I asked flustered. My colleague stood at my door and easily leaned against it.

"I'm not going to need you on Saturday," He said with a smile. My shoulders dropped.

"Oh, all right."

"Don't sound so down about it," He replied chuckling. I looked to his dark eyes and forced a smile. His skin was at least ten shades darker than mine. He had some sort of Native American blood in him, and he was attractive. Almost too attractive for his own good, but I enjoyed having him as my boss. He, like me, just loved the work itself.

"Sorry, it's just that I enjoy it."

"I know you do, but give yourself a break, yeah? You deserve it."

"A break, sure," I said dead panned.

"They're calling for snow tomorrow night."

"Yes, I am excited for that." We smiled again.

"See you on Monday, Bells." He left me with that. I met Jacob my senior year of college when I did an internship here. I never thought that I would get a full time job with his firm once I graduated, but Jacob loved my work, and made it happen. I owed him for that. If it weren't for him I would of had to take one of those jobs in Chicago or Missouri or Texas. I'm sure they would have been fine jobs, but my architecture was more country oriented. Plus, I grew up not far from here so it was home.

I had wine, blue prints, my laptop, and some clam chowder soup all sprawled out on my living room coffee table Friday evening. I took my time sketching out more plans for my house with Law & Order: SVU sounding on the TV in the background. I played the single woman bit good. It was textbook. My email pinged at me, and I jumped. Seeing that email address had my heart jumping up and down with anticipation. I opened the email quickly, anxiously.

_Dear Bella,_

_I am sorry for the inconvenience as well. Thank you for offering to help me. My letters must have gotten lost in the mail seeing as how they got to the address so late. It is a shame, indeed. I am quite confused on a few things. Number one being, why are you living in my house?_

_-E_

My heart stopped beating entirely at his words. I wanted to scream, run, hide, fight. I was not sure how to approach his response. Suddenly, my messenger sound went off popping a new small window open.

_Bella?_

It was him. My breathing hitched. What do I say? Should I answer? For the first time in weeks, I did not want to. But I did.

_Edward, hello._ I waited for an eternity to hear that reply sound before it came again_._

_Hello. I assume you got my email?_

_Yes, I just finished it. How can I help you_? I smacked my forehead with my hand, feeling unbelievably ridiculous for sounding like some sort of cashier in a grocery store. I waited agin for a reply before I started typing again.

_I am buying this house. I signed a rent to own lease in August_...

_Ah, I see. Do you like it?_ My eyebrows crossed in confusion.

_Um, yes. It is lovely here_.

_I agree. Is the oak out back still flooded with red leaves_? What is he doing? I was so confused, but decided to humor him anyway. Maybe he just missed being home. My home... Was his home.

_No, they have all fallen to the ground, now. Actually, it just started snowing an hour ago and is not supposed to let up until Sunday_.

_If you plan on leaving, the driveway gets slick about halfway down_. I smiled at his concern, even though I knew it was just him being polite.

_Thanks for the heads up_.

_You're welcome. Now, how did this happen, if you don't mind me asking_?

_Well, I found the add in the paper, and called the realtor. She said it had been on the market for a few months, and that I was the first to want it._

_It is an old house. It was my grandparent's_.

Suddenly, I became very sad and once again felt like an intruder of some sorts. It was awkward.

_I know that it was built in the 50's..._

_Yes, 1951. They died in 1989, and left the house to me. _I guess that meant that he was old. A lot older than me. I was only two in 1989. He sent another message before I could reply.

_Of course I was only a toddler then. I did not move in until I was 17._ I smiled again. He was closer to my age.

_So, you have lived in Gatlinburg all your life_? I grew more and more curious about him by the second.

_Yes. And if you did, too, then I must know you. Small town you know..._ I laughed out loud.

_I am from Morristown, actually. I went to college in Johnson City, and when I got a job offer here, I took it without question. I had an apartment downtown by the ice cream parlor before I found this place._

_The ice cream parlor is superb. Have you tried their cookie dough ice cream?_

_It is my favorite._

_Mine too_.

I smiled at the small connection, but still felt sad.

_Look, I am sorry about all of this. It must be quite a shock to you... I would be glad to give Tanya your letters. I mean, her letters_.

_Thank you. Her last name is Williams. If my inkling is correct, you can find her on Smoke Ave, house number 315_. His directions sounded oddly familiar.

_I will go there first thing tomorrow_.

_No, no. Only if the snow lets up. There is no rush._

_All right. And I will email you after I do, to let you know?_

_I appreciate it, Bella._

_My pleasure, Edward._

_Until next time.._. He signed off leaving me frozen. I was caught in such a stupor by him. He was so kind... And he did not even ask about Tanya. I did. I regretted it.

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**Okay, so what are your thoughts on Edward? Where do you think he is and why? And Jacob as Bella's boss? Hmmm...**

**We might see some Tanya in Chapter 3... Review it up, my lovely readers! xx**


	4. Chapter 3

**I don't know about you all, but this election stuff is depressing me, so I decided to update! It makes me happy...**

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**Chapter 3:**

**Wonderment**

The forecast was unfortunately correct. It snowed until Sunday morning making it very hard and dangerous for me to leave the house. Penelope and I cancelled our Saturday night meet up due to the hazardous roads. It wasn't until Sunday afternoon that the snowplows and salt trucks began their work. By Monday morning, it was safe enough to leave the house. My Volvo had all wheel drive, but still, I did not feel like putting it to the test with snow.

Before work, I made my way down Smoke Ave. to keep my promise to Edward. Well, it was more like the promise to myself. My knuckles were white from gripping the steering wheel so hard. I had to know why she left and sold the house. More importantly, I had to know if her and Edward were over. I found the house marked 315 easily and pulled into the driveway. A nice blue Lexus sat next to me in front of a very large and new looking house. It was all cabin wood and had green shutters. Pulling my visor mirror down, I checked my appearance. It was highly possible that Tanya was a bombshell. to that, I would nothing. My hair was curled in loose ringlets, my make-up no heavier than usual, and I liked my outfit. My knee high boots went with everything. Feeling satisfied enough, I grabbed the letters and stuck them in my inside coat pocket before I made my way to the front door trying desperately not to slip on ice. The doorbell sounded and I took a deep breath, preparing myself for the unknown. The door opened and I was floored.

"Yes?" A tall woman asked. She was so beautiful. She wasn't quite a natural beauty, though. She didn't have to work hard to be so, but with the layer of make-up on her face, and her high end clothing, it only attributed to her model like features. Her hair was long and a shiny gold color. I was only jealous of her perfect olive skin color. I swallowed hard.

"I'm looking for a Tanya Williams?" I croaked.

"I am Tanya. What can I do for you?"

"Well, my realtor, Rosalie," I started before she cut me off.

"Oh! You're buying my house, of course. I'll go get the spare barn key. Please, come in." Her house? When she opened the door further, I could see her pregnant belly. My stomach dropped. I did as she asked but had no idea about a barn key. Rosalie gave me two keys to the barn. I stood in the foyer awkwardly as she ran to another room. Her house was perfect. Extravagant art littered the walls. The wood floors shined clean and everything was in its place neatly. The house was incredibly familiar to me, yet I knew that I had never been here before. Suddenly, a dog came running up to me wagging its tail. I leaned down to scratch its head and it licked my hand leaving slobber. I heard Tanya's heels coming my way, so I stood up abruptly, wiping my wet hand on my skinny jeans.

"Here it is," She said smiling.

"Oh, thank you," I replied, taking the key.

"Grace, let her be." The dog obeyed her and scurried off to the adjoining room. Grace the dog, not the daughter. My breathing eased slightly.

"So how are you liking it?" I raised my eyebrows at her in confusion. My eyes kept glancing to her belly. Absently, my hand went to the letters hidden by my coat. They were burning.

"The house," She explained further with a chuckle.

"Oh, oh!" I said embarrassed with a nervous laugh.

"It is so beautiful. I adore it."

"That's wonderful. It was good to me."

"What made you want to sell?" I blurted out.

"It was time. I got married in July and my husband built this house, so it meant more to us to live here."

"Congratulations on your marriage," I replied kindly. I meant it.

"Thank you. That key opens the small barn loft, by the way. There may be some old things in there from the previous owners."

"Oh, well should I return them to the owners?" I questioned curiously.

"No, they died years ago. The house was left to me by my ex." Her ex. My stomach tightened.

"Should I return the things to him?" I hedged carefully.

"You're welcome to if you can find him. I doubt he'll come after them himself. He left the country six months ago."

"Oh?" I squeaked. She folded her arms and huffed. I could not tell if she was annoyed with my questioning, or with him.

"Yeah, the douche bag left for Africa to attended to sick children or something. It was only supposed to be a two month trip. We dated for a year." She laughed in a mean way.

"I'm sorry," I said, only because I was not sure what else to say.

"His loss. Besides, we were over long before that. I am glad he left. I was able to marry and start a family." She absently began to rub her pregnant belly. I forced a smile.

"How far along are you?"

"Six months," She replied beaming.

"That is so lovely. And I am sorry about your ex being... A douche," I said carefully. "I know what that is like."

"Yeah, but it was for the best. Fate, if you must. I highly doubt that he will ever return to the States."

"No?"

"He is too much of a workaholic. Which is why he left me the house to do with it what I wanted."

"Oh, I see."

"Anyway, good luck with your new home," She said happily.

"Thanks, and good luck on your..." I pointed to her belly and she laughed.

"I appreciate it." The letters stopped their burning against my chest. Tanya showed me out and I left with a big smile on the outside, and a deep feeling of hurt and wonderment on the inside.

The day could not pass fast enough. I avoided conversations with people and kept my brain on blue prints. The construction of the amphitheater was needing to be finished before Christmas for an opening show, and people were slacking. After work, I went straight to Penelope's house without even a text her way to let her know. I needed to figure all this out before I told Edward. I knocked on Penelope's front door frantically. She answered rather quickly.

"Bella?" She asked curiously.

"Hey, I'm sorry to come by unannounced..."

"It's all right. Come on in." I followed her inside to the kitchen table. The smell of hot chocolate was overwhelming and helped calm me instantly.

"Do you want a cup?" She asked attending to her small boiling pot.

"Please." I took a seat at the table and tried to think of where to start. My knee began bobbing up and down furiously. I chewed my thumb nail, thinking. Penelope waited patiently. She was in black skinny jeans with house shoes on. Her green sweater ignited the green in her eyes to a smoldering emerald color. She looked to me, then away quickly.

"So, I mean... I talked to him." I blurted out, embarrassed. I tried reminding myself that this was Penelope, my best friend. The one person in this life that understood me. My tight nerves lessened.

"Yes?" She asked softly.

"We messaged each other, and I found Tanya."

"Wow. You've been a busy girl." I gave a heartless chuckle at her joke.

"Okay, okay, start from the beginning." She took a seat next to me and handed over a cup of hot chocolate. I told her everything. Every detail, every word. She listened and spoke when necessary. Just speaking about it all, getting it off of my chest was extremely helpful.

"So he is not super old, or a soldier..." Penelope said pondering.

"I am glad about that. A doctor helping sick families in a third world country? How romantic," I replied dazed. Penelope smiled.

"And Tanya did not seem the least bit interested or sad, huh?"

"Nope. I think her new husband is all she cares about. She said she is six months pregnant... Edward has only been gone since May."

"Ah. So she got pregnant either right before, or right after."

"I just don't see why Edward left her the house. It belonged to his grandparents. Why couldn't he of left it to his parents or something?"

"You'd think that would make more sense, yes."

"What do I do, Penelope?" I begged.

"You're just going to have to tell him, Bella. If it were you, you would want to know."

"He'll be devastated."

"Yes, probably, but better he hear it from you when he is far away and has time to process it before coming home to the shock of his life."

"I suppose... But Tanya didn't think he would ever come back."

"You won't know until you ask."

"I'm scared."

"Don't be, Bella. You know, back in high school when I met Don, there was another girl competing for him." Penelope rarely spoke of Don. He was her first husband and died when they were in their early thirties of Melanoma. When she met Mae's dad, she knew her biological clock was ticking, so she kind of went along with him. They divorced not long after Mae's birth. He was a creepy bastard. Don was her true love. He always would be.

"What did you do?" I asked interested. Penelope leaned back in her chair and smiled.

"Oh, she wanted him so bad. She would flaunt herself all over the place and say things that made me look bad. In the end, it all came down to me just being me. That's what he wanted and I never failed in giving him that. I always told him the truth." I sat and thought about a young Penelope trying to get the boy and I smiled. Really, that is all I was trying to do, too.

"You're right... Thank you. I'll just be me, and be honest." She patted my hand across the table with hers.

"I want to hear all of the details," She said with a wink. I laughed and promised her just that.

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**Alright, we met Tanya! What did you all think of her?!**

**Yours reviews have been so sweet, thank you! Definitely look me up on FB for teasers and such. I would love to get to know you all! The URL is on my profile, or just search Greye Granger. You can't miss me... I promise for lots more Edward in Chapter 4! Review it up! ;)**


	5. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4:**

**Antiques**

After having dinner with Penelope, I took my time driving home that night. I went through every scenario in telling Edward the bad news. Would he expect it? My biggest fear is that after I told him, I would never hear from him again. Somehow, my new home became a constant reminder of him, because now I felt like it was still is... Or meant to be his. I opened my Mac as soon as I got to my bedroom. I looked to the clock and sighed when I realize it was well past midnight in Africa. When we spoke before, it was morning his time. I went to my email anyway and hoped. I opened a new message, but just before I began typing, I could see that he was online. My heart lifted. I opened a new instant message and typed quickly.

_You're up late._

I hit send before realizing that he would not know that I know where he is unless I saw Tanya. Anxiety hit me like a wrecking ball until his response came up.

_My only me time is late at night._

_Mine, too._

_You have news for me_?

My fingers began to shake over the keyboard as I thought of the nicest way possible to tell him. There was no nice way, sadly.

_May I ask you something, first?_

_Yes._

_How did you know Tanya would be at that address_?

I desperately wanted to know his answer because maybe it would lessen amy tragic news of his love with another. His reply took longer than I felt I could stand.

_Did she marry him_?

My heart broke in two as I very slowly typed my three letter response.

_Yes._

_I prepared myself for this. I hoped otherwise of course, but it is what it is._

_You are a strong person._

_No, just an expecting one. I know Tanya. How did she look_?

My nerves began to tingle. Should I tell him that she is pregnant? I did not think I could. The fear of hurting him further was unbearable.

_She is beautiful._

_Yes. I hope you did not give her my letters..._

_No..._

_Good. _

That confused me.

_She gave me a key to the barn loft and said that there might be some of your old belongings in there?_

_My parents' and grandparent's have some old antiques up there._

_I will save them for you._

_I appreciate that._

_Of course. May I ask another question?_

_You're just full of them, huh? Yes, you may_. My insides grew butterflies.

Why did you leave the house to her?

_I am a surgeon, Bella. When I was offered an internship to help people in Africa, I took it without question knowing full well that I may never come home. It is war here._

_Do you think that Tanya thought you were dead, so she sold the house?_

_No. I think Tanya fucking sold it without a care in the world._

If it were possible, my heart would have broken all over again for this man.

_Edward, If you come back here, I want you to have your house_.

I meant what I said and I was thankful for the courage to say it.

_That is very kind if you, but you bought it fair and square. It is yours_.

I lingered over the keyboard unable to think of a quick reply.

_Well, then if you ever come home, I will have your stuff from the barn loft._

_I am coming home._

_Good._

_Soon._

_Oh_?

My heart pieced itself back together and began to pump furiously.

_I will miss Thanksgiving, but I will be home for Christmas_.

_That is wonderful. I am happy for you_.

I tried to sound as nonchalant about it as possible, which was incredibly hard.

_It will be good to be home_.

_Will you leave again?_ I asked worriedly.

_No. I want to be home for good and begin my life for me. I've spent years helping people, but it is time to do me._

_You'll stop practicing?_

_No, I have an old office building downtown that I will open as a private practice_.

He will be in the area! My heart swelled.

_Edward, how old are you_? I asked abruptly.

_Haha. I must sound pretty fucking old being a surgeon, yes? I am twenty-eight. I went to the University of Knoxville when I was sixteen_.

_Damn. That's incredible_.

I knew he was smart, but college at sixteen?

_I'm not that smart though. I was homeschooled, finished early and went onto college. How old are you?_

_I am twenty-five. I graduated in architecture_.

_I find that fascinating. Have you made any plans for the house?_

Should I tell him? I remembered Penelope and her honesty.

_Actually, yes..._

_I would love to see them sometime. That place has a lot of potential._

_I would love to show you._

I held my breath waiting for his reply. Was that too much? Would he catch on to my flirting?

_It is a date. Although for now, I must get off of here. I have an early surgery. May we talk again, Bella?_

_Absolutely_. I smiled so wide that it hurt my face.

_It may be a week or so, seeing how I must go out in the field for a little while..._

_That is fine. I'll be here._

_Thank you, Bella. It is nice to talk to someone._

_That feeling is mutual. :) _

He logged off and I fell asleep almost instantly, feeling happier than I ever had before.

The coming days had dragged on tirelessly. Each one that passed took longer than the one before. Work was slowing down for the season and the amphitheater was near completion. I spent a lot of time over at Penelope's and Mae came home for the coming holiday last weekend. It was the evening before Thanksgiving making it the seventh day gone since I had heard from Edward. I grew incredibly anxious and worried that he did not wish to speak to me again. Maybe he was more hurt over Tanya than he let on, I didn't know. That was the main problem; I just did not know. I knew so little about the man to begin with, so how could my heart already ache for him so?

I took this free evening to go out into the barn loft. Snow was on the forecast again and I did not want any antiques left up there in the cold. The door was small and I removed the key from my pocket. It took some finagling, but it finally broke open with a loud pop. Thick dust littered the room. I coughed a couple of times before it all settled. There were tools, old tractor parts, and modeling hay all around the enclosed space. I searched for any sort of antique but found nothing. I began to move the heavy old tools and ruffle through hay and came across a small box in the corner. Somehow the old hay had protected the box from water damage. I lifted it up and carried it out carefully.

Back in the warmth of the house, I set the box down on my kitchen table next to my open Mac. It carried the musty smell of the barn with it. Peeling off the tape, I opened the box. A large and old photo album was the only thing in it. I frowned, but decided to look through it. Old pictures littered the pages. I guessed that they had to be of Edward's grandparents and then his parents. None of them had any pictures of a little boy, just of the adult couples. His mother and father were beautiful. When I came to the last page of the book, there was a picture of Tanya next to a beautiful man that could only be Edward. His hair was bronze and short. He had a light beard the color of his hair and perfectly white teeth. On his head was a graduation cap. Tanya looked even more beautiful then in her white summer dress revealing her cleavage. They stood in front of the main building on the UT Campus with a large sign behind them reading, "**Class of 2010**." My heart split in two at the sight of them together. They looked perfect, like statues of the God's. Even worse, they looked happy. My messenger ping went off and I jumped from my sad daze abruptly. I looked to my computer to see a new message from Edward.

_Bella, I have not been able to stop thinking about you..._

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**Well now, how about that?! Looks like Edward had some time to get over Tanya, yeah? Or maybe not quite yet... Review this story guys! I will be posting Chapter 5 some time this weekend... Leave love! xx**


	6. Chapter 5

**All right, you guys are fabulous. Maybe this story will beat all of my others in reviews, what do you think?! Lets do it!**

**Happy Friday update ;)**

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**Chapter 5:**

**Thankful**

_Edward, hi_. _I have thought a lot about you, too_...

I was so nervous, excited, scared, angry, and worried all at the same time that it made me dizzy. I grabbed my computer, my wine glass, and my wits before I jogged upstairs to my room. As soon as I came in the door, that familiar ping went off. I chose not to look just yet as I ripped my jeans off and climbed into my large bed. With my down comforter placed comfortably overtop of me and a large sip of white wine later, I looked back to my Mac on my lap.

_Thank God. I was worried that it would freak you out, but I had to tell you. I can't explain it._

_I can't either... I d_o_n't know if I am more afraid or excited about it all_.

If any time was the time to be honest, it was now. I took another sip of my wine for courage. Edward's responses came quicker than usual.

_We barely know each other._

_We could change that_. I smiled.

_Yes, let's. Are you excited for Thanksgiving tomorrow?_

_Yes, but mainly because of the food._

_Will you be with family?_

_No. I do not have a relationship with my parents and I am an only child. I will spend it with my best friend and her daughter._

_I am sorry about your parents._

_Don't be. It is their loss. I have moved on. What will you do for thanksgiving?_

_Haha, work. But there will be a gathering tomorrow evening with a shit ton food which will be nice._

_Good. It is going to snow again tonight.._. I hovered over the keys deciding whether or not to tell him about the photo album. I decided against it, and hit enter to send my message.

_I miss the snow. It is hot and sandy here_.

The familiar scent of sand came to me abruptly.

_If you're still due back in December, I can assure you that snow will be waiting. The almanac has predicted a very wet winter._

_Fabulous. I fucking miss being cold._

_Haha. Okay, Edward, what is your favorite color, TV show, and animal_?

Each sip I took of my wine made me giddier and giddier about this predicament with Edward.

_Twenty questions is it? All right, I can play. Blue, Family Guy, and Dogs_.

I assumed everything but his TV Show.

_Family Guy?_

_It is funny and stupid. I enjoy laughing. Okay, your turn._

_Green, Law & Order: SVU, and cats._

_Oh, I see. Well, it was nice knowing you_.

My heart fell to the floor until another message popped up.

_Cats and pedophilia cop cases? Haha!_

_Oh, fuck you. Cats are sweet, easy and cheap. And those cop cases are bad ass._

_Not to mention the lead female is pretty hot._

_I won't argue with you there ;)_

_I laughed at that. You're full of surprises. What do you look like_?

I was stumped for a moment as I tried to think of how I would describe myself without sounding too negative.

_I am plain... Ordinary._

_...Can I get a little more detail than that?_

_Ha. Okay, I have long auburn hair. I'm very pale, but I do have some freckles. I like them. I have no assets up top... And I am thin. _

I could hear my pulse in my ears as I waited for a response.

_You are beautiful_.

I melted into my bed like thick boiling chocolate. I read his reply a dozen times before typing one back.

_You're just saying that_.

_No ma'am. You could be three hundred pounds and bald and I would still think the same._

_Liar!_

_Okay... Maybe not bald. _

I laughed so hard my side began to hurt.

_Don't you want to know how I look_? He asked.

I already knew, of course. He was stunning.

_It doesn't matter to me._

_Oh no? Well, I am seven feet tall, Hispanic, and I have man boobs..._

_Sounds sexy._

_You're crazy._

_Yes, I am._

_I like that about you. And I am average looking._

_We'll see._

_Yes, you will. I hate to end this, but I have to be up in a couple of hours. They have said my return home date is December fifteenth. _

It was too good to be true.

_That is wonderful, Edward!_

_Will I see you sometime?_

_Yes. _

My splitting smile began to hurt my face.

_I will count the days... Until then_. He signed off. I sat in silence with my broad smile before drifting off into a blissful sleep.

Thanksgiving day was upon us and I was running late. Since I was up with Edward, I overslept. Penelope called to check on me just as I was about to leave when a knock came to my door.

"Hold on, Penelope... Someone is at my door."

"Who is it?" She asked.

"Just a sec," I told her. I set my phone down on the small table by my front door. I opened the door and was met with a large bouquet of flowers.

"Ma'am," A tall black man addressed. "Are you Bella?"

"Yes," I stuttered.

"Happy Thanksgiving. If you could just sign here." He handed me an electronic pad and I signed my name sloppily. My knees were shaking. He handed me the flowers and jogged back to his truck. I closed the door slowly and could hear Penelope yelling trough my phone. I picked it up in a daze as I walked back to my kitchen.

"Hey," I said slowly.

"Well?" Penelope asked anxiously.

"They're flowers."

"Is there a card?" I did not even think to look until she said something, and sure enough, a small card was placed between a lily and an orchid. I read it aloud.

_"Bella, I am thankful for you. Twenty-three days... -Edward_."

"Oh, how sweet!" Penelope cooed. Tears rimmed my eyes.

"What is in twenty-three days?"

"He comes home," I said absently.

"You better hurry your ass up and get over here, so I can hear all these missing details."

"Bella!" She shouted. It snapped me from my daze and I told her I was leaving. I smiled once again at my flowers. My heart swelled with so much love that I feared it would burst. I put them in a vase and set them on my kitchen island before I left for Penelope's.

The evening of Thanksgiving dawned on me and my best friend lightly. Mae had passed out on the living room couch after too much food and football, leaving Penelope and myself alone in the den. We were full and very sleepy, but I was finally able to talk about Edward with her.

"I cannot even begin to explain it, Penelope. I care about him a lot."

"That is a good thing, Bella. You deserve it."

"But I still know so little."

"Ask him."

"I am afraid that it will push him away."

"Doing the right thing is never wrong. You're beautiful, smart, funny, and he should be allowed to know that from you."

"He wants to see me when he gets back..."

"So?"

"So what about Tanya? He was able to drop her so quickly. I am afraid that I'm just a rebound to him or something."

"You're only afraid of taking that leap," She offered carefully. I frowned.

"What leap?"

"The leap off of that ledge into love. You've never done it before. Of course that would be frightening."

"Do you regret anything in love?"

"There are no regrets in love, Bella." How was she always able to say the right thing? I loved her more than she would ever know. Penelope and I never discussed feelings toward one another. It has always been an easy, effortless friendship.

"You know," I began softly, "You will find love again." She smiled wistfully.

"Some day."

"What about that guy, Ben?"

"He's young."

"Yeah, but guys your age are old." She laughed wholeheartedly.

"This is true. They're either retired or boring."

"Ben is only ten years younger, Penelope. You are everything that you just said about me. beautiful, accomplished, funny... Have you called him back?"

"Not yet..."

"I'll make you a deal," I offered.

"Oh?"

"I'll take my leap, if you take yours." Penelope sipped her wine and took a moment to answer.

"We're in it together, deal?"

"Deal." She offered her hand to me. I took it, and shook affirmative. All fear of my leap began to dissolve.

"I am thankful for you, Penelope," I told her sweetly while still shaking her hand. She tightened her grip.

"As I am thankful for you."

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**Cute, right? Review it up, and I'll post more super soon!**


	7. Chapter 6

**Good morning my lovelies. Here's a little something to start your day!**

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**Chapter 6:**

**First Sight**

_Bella, Dec. 13, 2012_

_I am so sorry that it has taken me this long to contact you again. My return home date is still the same... Meaning in two days! I hope you enjoyed the flowers. I meant what I said._

My body pulsed with excitement reading his recent message. The flowers he sent had begun to die, so I removed them from water to dry them. I would keep those flowers forever. His last email was sent Thanksgiving night to tell me that he would be out in the field one last time before coming home. I had written him back and gave him my phone number to call when he arrived in town. If time had moved slow before, it was barely moving at all now. My eyes looked to the nearest clock every chance they could, only making time pass slower. It was Friday night and I decided to spend it with Penelope. She would surely help keep my mind off the time.

"I called Ben," Penelope confessed smiling. I began to bounce up and down in my chair with excitement.

"And?!"

"And we have a date next weekend..." I jumped from my chair to throw my arms around Penelope. It was slightly awkward seeing as how we rarely touched, but she hugged me back. It was important to me that she found love again in someone. It took a lot of guts for her to make that call, I am sure. I sat back in my chair with a happy sigh. I looked to Penelope who had a smile matching my own. The lines on her face were not old, but beautiful. And her hands were long and thin like mine with lines that still had stories to tell. I looked up to her highly.

"What do you say we put up the Christmas tree?" Penelope offered.

"What about Mae?"

"She met a boy..." I laughed at Penelope wiggling her eyebrows.

"Oh?"

"Yep, and she is head over heels for him. She is in North Carolina meeting his folks." When Penelope wasn't busy teaching English to high school students, her southern accent came through thickly. I had picked it up over the years, too. We are, after all, in the south.

"Good for her! It must be the time for love."

"So... The tree?" Penelope wiggled her eyebrows again with a smirk.

"Let's do it," I challenged.

The tree was cedar and cut fresh from Penelope's backyard. It took some finagling, but we got it in the house with no catastrophe's. We were quite proud of ourselves. We strung white lights around the tall and thick pine before moving on to the ornaments. I grabbed another glass ball from the box and searched for the right branch.

"Decorating a tree is art," I said as I hung the green ball. It was shiny enough to see my reflection.

"Every ornament has its place," Penelope concurred. I sighed.

"Penelope, what if I just want to fucking jump his bones when I see him?"

"Jump his bones?" Penelope laughed loudly.

"You know what I mean!" I argued.

"So what if you do? I am sure that once he sees you, he'll feel the same way."

"I want to take it slow... But seeing as how I already know what he looks like..." I trailed off embarrassed. I did not want to confess my dreams of him as of late. Each one was hotter than the last. When I would wake up from them, anxiety overwhelmed me.

"When it happens, it is supposed to happen. Don't worry about when it should." I sighed again lightly.

"What about Ben?"

"What about him?" She countered.

"Is he hot?" Penelope laughed.

"Yes. And it has been much longer since I have had sex than you."

"I doubt that," I stated lamely.

"Oh, really?"

"Four years."

"Shit, five years for me," She huffed with pride.

"We are so lame! Hey, if Ben and Edward don't work out, I say we become nuns."

"I am so with you." We laughed together and finished the tree while swapping old sex stories.

A familiar buzzing noise sounded loudly waking me from my deep sleep. I rolled over and tried to ignore it. It stopped, but then began again not long after. I bent my arm backward to grab my pesky iPhone off of the table. I put it to my ear annoyed.

"Yeah," I said groggily.

"Bella?" I deep voice asked.

"Speaking."

"It's Edward." My eyes shot open and I sat up instantly. The sudden movement sent off a pounding beat in my head. I looked up to the clock above the fireplace that read three pm.

"Hi," I said exasperated. He chuckled and I thought I would die from the beautiful sound.

"Hey. Did I wake you?"

"Uh, no, no!" I lied, jumping off the couch. I stumbled over the rug and fell down hard. My iPhone shot across the wood floor and I hurt my knee.

"Fuck!" I cursed. I jolted forward to grab my phone.

"Are you still there?" I asked breathless.

"Yes. Are you all right?" He sounded concerned. I rubbed my now raw and burning knee.

"I am great. Are you here?" Excitement returned to me, overruling everything else.

"I am driving now. It'll be about forty five minutes. Do you want to meet somewhere?"

"Uh," I stumbled. I looked back to the clock then down at my appearance. My clothes were all twisted up and my hair was knotted. There was no way that I was going to be able to go home, get ready, then meet him all in just forth five minutes.

"Why don't you come to the house," I offered, hoping he would accept. The line went silent for a moment. If it weren't for the sound of the radio playing some Journey in the background, I would have thought he hung up.

"Are you sure?"

"Absolutely."

"All right. I'll see you soon."

"Okay," I replied giddily. We hung up and I went to sit on the chair that I had slept on all night. I looked to the couch adjacent from me to see Penelope sleeping soundly. Suddenly, I regretted our late night. It did not matter how tired we were, nine times out of ten we ended up staying awake until at least eight am. We just always had so much to say to one another. Looking back to the clock, I got up and gathered my things. I wrote a note to Penelope and placed it on the table in front of her. I would call her as soon as I could. Just before walking away, she stirred.

"Bella?"

"Yeah, it's me. Edward called and he's coming to the house," I whispered. "Go back to sleep." She turned to look at me. Her green eyes always stunned me because of the certain green color that they were. It was indescribable.

"Call me, okay? And good luck."

"Thank you. And I had fun last night."

"Don't be nervous. You'll be great. Love you." Her eyes drifted closed. I smiled widely.

"I love you, too," I told her truthfully. I left her house empowered by her in some unknown way.

I managed to shower and towel dry my hair with a few minutes to spare until Edward's supposed arrival. The house was clean and smelt of apple cinnamon that my new candles let off. I had food if we were to decide on eating. Everything was perfect, except for me. I was a mess. My navy blue sweater felt too big, my jeans felt too tight, and my boots felt too high. I had a bra on but it only made my chest look worse in this sweater, so I took it off. He wouldn't notice. No one ever did. It was my little secret to go braless most of the time. My hair was wavy and I applied little make-up. Maybe I should have put more blush and added some eyeshadow. I tried sitting but fidgeted too much. There was standing, but I paced too quick. When my phone rang, I jumped. It was Edward. Worry flooded me. I knew he wasn't lost. Did he change his mind? My worry wished it so.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Hey."

"Where are you?" My throat was dry. I took a quick sip of water. The line was silent for a moment too long.

"I'm at the head of the driveway..." He replied softly. I dashed to my large living room windows and looked out. Through the naked trees I could see a silver car at the end of my very long driveway. It was idling quietly. It shined brilliantly against the mounds of snow that surrounded it.

"What's wrong?" I whispered.

"I'm nervous."

"So am I."

"Bella," He sighed in frustration as if searching for the right words, "I have so much about me that you may hate. I've never been this nervous before."

"What are you most nervous about?"

"My looks, my voice, my hobbies... The list is endless."

"I'm worried about those things, too. I guess the question is... Are you worried and nervous enough to turn and drive away?" Another long pause. I began chewing on my finger nail as I contemplated my own question. Was this what I wanted? I thought back to how good my heart felt and knew the answer. I also knew that he felt the same way.

"No," He replied strongly.

"Then come see me," I whispered. He ended the call abruptly and I could see his car begin its way down my driveway. I took a deep breath and went to my front door, opening it slowly. The chill from outside went straight to my bones, but I didn't bother with a coat. I felt hot and cold all at once. His car pulled behind mine. I could not see him through the dark tinted windows, but the engine cut off. I stood behind one of the porch pillars protectively. I waited. He waited. Gathering all I possessed, I stepped down onto the first step, showing myself to him. My long hair caught in the cold wind, slapping my face and tangling around my neck. When his door opened, I stopped breathing. He stepped out, and stood up taller than I imagined. Taller than the one picture I that had seen of him let on. His hair was longer, but not long. It was still a wild bronze color mixed with brown. On his face, he had beard stubble. His skin had a slight tan to it from the desert sun. He wore dark jeans, old combat looking boots, and a thick blue and red flannel button up. My heart shattered into thousands of pieces. All vanity had left me. There was no comparison to him. Suddenly, seeing me fully and taking me in as I had done him, he smiled widely showing his perfect teeth.

Oddly, it felt like I was face to face with my favorite celebrity. I was starstruck, frozen in place. Slowly, carefully, he began to walk towards me. Another rush of the cold wind broke me from my stupor. I smiled a heavenly smile because I felt like I was in heaven. God was somehow rewarding me with this perfect man that was getting closer and closer to me by the second. When he reached the bottom step, of only three with me still at the top, I could see his eyes. Were they hazel? No, more like the color of gold. His soul shined through them. It was bright, but clouded with uncertainty.

"Bella," He addressed kindly. His voice was honey. The sound of him over the phone was nothing compared to this.

"Edward." My voice was strong and assuring, surprising me greatly. What if I were to fling my arms around him? I relented, worried that it would freak him out. He stepped onto the second step, now only one away from me. In his closeness, I could smell him. My head went into a fog, intoxicated.

"Would it be too much if I were to hug you?" He asked politely. His question was ironic. Perfect. It floored me. I wanted to scream and shout my approval but my eyes betrayed me. They filled with tears. Their sudden appearance was unknown to me. It could only be every emotion running through me, coming out all at once the only way they knew how. My throat tightened. I could not answer him. Instead, I shook my head, giving him the approval. I backed up so that he could step up to my level. The top of my head went to his nose. With much caution, he reached his hand up to swipe away a tear that had escaped my right eye. His long and thin hand was like fire to my cheek, igniting me to awaken. Without warning, my arms reached out and tightened around his body forcefully. When I felt his arms wrap around me in return, the world ended.

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**I love that last sentence. All right, talk about cute. Are you glad they finally met in person? Are you all still liking Penelope?**

**I will update again soon. My mother-in-law is coming for a week long visit tomorrow... I'm sure a lot of you know how that goes. LOL. Review this little story up, yeah**?


	8. Chapter 7

**Just because I had to have you all read this chapter :)**

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**Chapter 7:**

**Christmas Tree**

It was not long ago that I had been wishing for time to move faster. Now, I wanted time to stop entirely. I wanted to be frozen for all of eternity on this day, Saturday the fifteenth of December. Shock and disbelief pulsed through my body as I stared at Edward who sat on my couch across from me. He crossed his legs trying to get comfortable. It felt too good to be true, to be real, or to be honest.

"Are you all right?" He asked softly. His mouth was hiding a slight half smile.

"Yes," I breathed out breathless. Who knew how long I had been holding it in.

"Would you like some wine?" I offered.

"Please," He replied kindly. I went to the kitchen and poured a glass carefully with shaking hands. I knew Edward's eye were on my backside.

"Good to be home?" I asked lightly coming back into the room. Handing him his glass of White Zinfandel, our fingers almost touched. I felt a shock of electricity and pulled away quickly. Fortunately, I didn't think Edward noticed.

"It feels great. Not much has changed. Although, I did see a large construction of some sort as I came into the city limits."

"That would be the new amphitheater," I explained proudly.

"Ah, I see."

"Just what we need, right? More tourists," I teased.

"Can't live with them, can't live without them," He countered with a chuckle. An awkward silence broke out between us. The house grew quiet. I mentally began to kick myself for not putting on any music. Finally, we both began to speak at the same time, causing us to stop and laugh.

"Go ahead," I offered. He sighed.

"I know this has to be weird for you, and I can go if you'd like. I don't want you to be uncomfortable." It fascinated me how well he could speak when nervous. He did not stutter like me.

"Don't go," I answered quickly. He met my eyes to see if he could see truth in them. I smiled.

"Where is your Christmas tree?" He asked, searching what parts of the house he could see.

"Oh, I stopped putting one up a couple of years ago. It just made me feel lonely. I spend the holiday's at my be-"

"Best friend's house," He finished for me. I smiled embarrassed.

"She's all I have," I admitted sheepishly. He gave me a warm understanding smile.

"I bet she is great," He added sweetly, "But, I think you need a tree in here. It can't be Christmas without one." He stood up and walked around the table to stand in front of me. My insides began to quiver.

"Oh no?" I questioned with furrowed eyebrows.

"I know just where to get one. It's on the property." He held out his hand to me, and I took it without another thought.

There were almost five acres that came with the house. In fact, the land was what made me really want to buy the property. Like Edward said, there is a lot of potential. We bundled up in coats and gloves and had been walking for ten minutes. Edward had a saw slung over his shoulder securely from the barn as we entered the tree line. We didn't speak, but this silence wasn't awkward for some reason. It was comfortable. We walked through the brush and between old tall leafless trees before stopping. I looked to Edward who was staring straight ahead.

"There she is," He said smiling. I followed his gaze and right in the middle of this small forest, was the perfect Christmas tree. The grey light from the day was growing dim with the impending Twilight.

"It will be dark soon," Edward noted. I nodded and walked up to the tree.

"It is beautiful," I whispered. The branches were full, and it was as tall as Edward. He bent down and turned on the saw as I took a few steps back. It fell to the ground after just a moment of sawing sending snow into the air as dust. It twinkled in the air beautifully. Edward brushed by me ever so lightly, sending a new wave of electricity through me. He grabbed the trunk of the tree and tied a rope to it as we made our way back.

"You're an expert with trees," I said teasingly. He had managed to get it in the house and placed it in front of my living room windows. It seemed so much taller inside the house. Edward returned the saw to the barn and I had gathered all the Christmas decorations I owned from the attic and began opening the boxes. I cherished all of these things and it had been a long time since I had seen them.

"I've had practice," He joked. He grabbed a string of lights and went to the tree. Thankfully, I had turned on a Christmas radio station on the TV that played in the background nicely. We had our wine and the decorations: a perfect combination. I decided to ask him the things that I wanted to know so desperately. The wine was helping me, like it always did when it came to bravery.

"Edward, may I ask you something?" I began carefully. I grabbed the string of lights on the opposite side of the tree that he handed me. He smirked in such a cute way.

"Anything."

"Tell me about Tanya." It was incredibly hard to say her name out loud with him close to me. He stiffened, but recovered fast. I could see his eyes change as I watched him, waiting.

"We met in college. She was studying interior design and I somehow ended up in one of her classes. Because of her, I took the stupid class," He said annoyed. I searched or any sort of love, but could not see any.

"We were only friends at first. For a long time actually. She dated a lot of different guys. That should have warned me off, but I was stupid and naive. After graduation, we moved here as roommates. Then..." Suddenly I realized that I did not need the details. My stomach churned painfully. We had moved on to the ornaments. The tree left off an intoxicating scent of pine.

"We dated for just over a year. I was so happy. Looking back on it now though, it wasn't real. It was all the hype of her that I had built up for years. When I finally got her for me, it was as if I won the game... The game I had with myself. She seemed happy, too, for a little while. I knew when she began seeing him. A man knows," He said sadly as if he were wishing it all away. Every memory seemed to hurt or disgust him now. He took a long pull of his wine, then took a deep breath.

"He was my best friend. They met through me." My heart ached for him. I wanted to do whatever he wanted of me just to take away that look in his glorious face.

"It went on for a while, and when I took the internship, she begged me not to go. She apologized for seeing him and wanted a life with me. I had signed the internship papers before she began to fall at my feet, so there was no going back. I believed her words, her confession of love. I was an idiot." He ran a long delicate hand through his hair in frustration. The tree was complete except for the angel that was supposed to sit at the tip top. I slowly held it out to him. He broke from his daze and smiled half heatedly. He took the angel and placed her at the top of our Christmas tree. I went around the room to turn off all the lights. As soon as I hit the last switch, Edward plugged in the tree lights. A soft glow illuminated the large space. A piano and violin rendition of What Child Is This floated through the air between us. I walked over to stand next to him as we gawked at our tree. It was a stunning sight with the night behind it through the windows. It made the world glow.

"Are you still-" I tried, before he cut in.

"In love with her?" I gave a slight nod.

"No. It never was love. It was all in my head."

"Edward, I am sorry." Bravery was what moved my hand to lay on his upper arm. He did not stiffen under my touch.

"Don't be. It brought me you." I melted through the floor. Once again I began cursing the world for not being able to freeze time.

"Yes, another woman brought me you," I replied easily, hoping to get a genuine smile out of him. It did. He turned to face me fully with my hand falling from his arm. He caught it before it dropped back to my side. My hand, enclosed by his, was placed over his heart.

"I do not even know your last name, Bella, but I have been falling for you for longer than I care to admit."

"I've been falling longer," I replied dazed. His hand was perfect around mine. I couldn't get over the feeling.

"Not possible," he said with a crooked smile. My body could not take any more melting. I was gone.

"Since I read the first letter," I admitted sheepishly. "And it wasn't even meant for me."

"I think," He began, but hesitated to pull my hand to his mouth. His breath was warm. "If it wasn't meant for you, we would not be here." He kissed my hand with the lightest if kisses. We stared into each others eyes looking or something that we both knew was there. I wanted him in any way that he would allow, and I was prepared to give him any part of me. It wasn't out of weakness, but a choice. His free hand went to my chin. He hesitated for a moment before putting his mouth to mine. I kissed him, and to me, it was the first kiss I had ever given anyone. His lips were soft against my chapped ones. I would have been embarrassed, but I felt nothing of the sort. There were no flashing lights, no flying doves, and no fireworks ignited. It was an explosion. Standing in front of a Christmas tree, it did not get anymore romantic than that. Nothing more beautiful would ever be said or written. Two hearts burst open separately, and slowly began to piece back together as one.

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**Any thoughts...? I foresee some lemons in the very near future... Review!**


	9. Chapter 8

**Lazy Sunday update ;) I won't be drinking heavily because instead of today, the mother-in-law is coming tomorrow!**

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**Chapter 8:**

**Sapphire Sheets**

The thick sapphire colored sheets that lined my bed were shown as I led Edward into my room. Upon entering, it was not just a room that I was opening up to him: it was myself. My white down comforter laid at the end of the bed from its use the night before. With hands linked, we stood in front of each other with lust filled eyes. There was longing in them, too. I knew that I would not be a whore for this. I began to undo the buttons of his flannel shirt. He watched me carefully. When all were undone, I pushed it off of his shoulders to reveal his perfect torso. Hair dusted his skin from his navel up until it branched out over his chest. I smiled at the feeling of the soft curls between my fingers. I was in no rush, and neither was he. Fear left me. This was sacred and pure, so what was there to fear in the end? I removed my sweater and dropped it to the floor. His eyes grew wide in surprise. My chest was bare, braless. Goosebumps made their appearance all over my freshly revealed skin, but I was not cold. Suddenly, we began to undress ourselves.

Naked, everything felt different. Edward had a crooked smile on his chiseled face. I sat down on the bed and scooted backwards a little. When I thought he would sit down next to me, he chose otherwise. His hands went to my thighs moving up and then down again softly. He moved so slow, torturing my insides. His touch was hotter than any sun the skies knew. My knees hung off of the edge of bed limply. I let my head drop backwards and smiled widely. My hair tickled my hands. He kneeled on the wood floor, covered by a plush rug in front of me. My eyes widened in disbelief. Embarrassment flickered through my mind until he looked up to me smiling. All insecurities left me. I felt safe. I felt adored... Worshiped even, with him before me in such a position. He parted my legs wider. Propped up by my hands, I watched him as he moved his mouth closer to my heat. My breathing hitched as I felt his hot breath come over me. No one had ever given me anything oral before, so I had no idea what to expect. He began licking, and I moaned involuntarily. It was an exquisite feeling that nothing could ever prepare you for. His mouth did wonderful things to me. I started to move my hips with his rhythm. My orgasm would not take long if he kept this up and as much as I was enjoying it, I wanted him in another way, too. My hands went to his silky hair and tugged slightly. He raised his head to look at me confused.

"Come up here," I whispered with a raspy voice. He smirked and stood up. He wiped his mouth with the back of his arm and leaned over me. I scooted back more, allowing him room.

"Do you have a condom?" He asked embarrassed. "I sort of stopped carrying them around a long time ago." I laughed kindly.

"I've been on the pill for years. We're good to go." We chuckled awkwardly for a moment, looking into one another's eyes.

"I've never had sex without one. Lucky me." I reached up to place my hand on his cheek.

"You are so pretty," I whispered.

"Not as pretty as you," He replied truthfully. My heart smiled. We kissed each other hard, wanting. He positioned himself between my legs, but hesitated before entering me. I tilted my hips upward in need. Slowly, easily, he entered me. My body had never felt so full before. We both gasped at the feeling. He let his weight fall on top of me as I wrapped my arms around him, feeling the grooves of his perfect back. His shoulder muscles tightened as he began to move in and out, each time harder than the last.

"Yes," I breathed, excited with pleasure. He moaned and it was the sexiest sound I had ever heard. I wanted desperately to hear it again, so I lifted my legs. My knees rested on the back of his arms, opening me wider. He moaned again, and so did I. His thrusts became harder and harder, faster and faster until a fog came over me. I lost all sense of the world as my body suddenly came around him. His release matched mine as we flew high above our tangled bodies. I cried out loudly. We slowed, and tried to catch our breath which took longer than expected. He held me tightly until he slowly rolled off, allowing my chest to ease. We laid next to each other comfortably content. I looked over to him to see a smile wide on his face.

"Let's sleep," He said dreamily. I laughed and moved up to the pillows. It had not been dark outside for long, but I suddenly felt exhausted. Edward grabbed the down comforter and pulled it up to us. We slid under the sheet and comforter and I nestled into the crook of his arm. His chest hair ticked my cheek, and he was so warm.

"You're quiet," He said wondering.

"I am content. No words needed," I told him. His laugh sounded sweet beneath my ear on his torso.

"What is your last name?"

"Swan."

"Bella Swan, I, Edward Cullen, can not, nor will I even try explaining any of this, but you are wonderful." I tightened my arm around him. Cullen. How perfect.

"I can't wait to wake up next to you," I said sleepily.

"I am going to make an amazing breakfast tomorrow morning."

"Good, because my cooking is shit," I admitted proudly. His laugh was the last thing I heard before falling into a perfect sleep, filled with dreams of a naked Edward.

The strong scent of bacon aroused my senses the next morning. My eyes slowly flittered open to see the spot next to me empty. I frowned and rolled over. I knew Edward was still here, so for that, I was grateful. I felt rested. The light of dawn outside the window was just becoming known. I yawned when all of a sudden, I felt the bed move. Arms wrapped themselves around me protectively. I smiled and breathed in his scent.

"I'm sorry," He whispered in my ear.

"What for?" I asked groggily.

"I was hoping to be back up before your eyes ever opened."

"The smell of your cooking makes it easy to forgive you," I teased. "What time is it?"

"Only seven. We slept a long time."

"I feel good."

"So do I."

"Is there coffee?" He scoffed.

"Of course." I smiled. Edward's hand slowly ran down my chest until he reached my hip. When I thought it would be sensual, he tricked me. I began to laugh hysterically as he tickled my hip.

"Edward!" I cried. "Stop that! I have to pee!" He laughed at my outburst, and relented his tickling hand. My hair knotted together in every which way, getting stuck beneath my arm. I shot out of bed and cold air wrapped around me in a mean way. I shivered. My thick black cotton robe was on the bench at the end of the bed. Edward was staring at me with an open mouth. He was wearing flannel pajama pants and a black v-neck t-shirt. My eyes took him in dreamily as he kept on sharing at me. His eyes went from my feet to my head, then back down again.

"What?" I asked embarrassed, pulling the robe on and tying it securely.

"It was incredibly dim light last night. You have a perfect body." My cheeks turned blood red instantly. Edward noticed and winked at me.

"Shut the fuck up," I teased. I walked up to the head of the bed and grappled a pillow, hitting him over the chest with it. He recovered quickly and took hold of the pillow tightly.

"You know," I began teasing, "Too bad you don't have those man boobs. I could use a little extra fat up top. You could have donated." I put my hands on my hips expectantly.

"Then just for that reason, I am glad that I don't have man boobs!" He argued. I smirked.

"Besides, think of it this way," He continued, "When you're old and grey, they won't be sagging down to your hips."

"Ew!" I yelled, scrunching my nose up.

"Sexy," He replied, with wiggling eyebrows. I grabbed another pillow and threw it at his face. He was ready to swat me with the one he had been holding, but I dashed to the bathroom before he could.

"I'll get you for that!" He called after to me playfully.

The kitchen smell was intoxicating. Bacon cooked slowly on the stove and the coffee pot dinged its completeness just as I was getting the creamer out from the fridge. Edward went back to maintaining the food and I got a mug from the cupboard. Sipping my hot coffee filled with more vanilla caramel creamer than actual coffee, I went into the living room. The Christmas tree lights illuminated beautifully. I smiled. Before returning to Edward, my eyes saw all the snow outside. That made me happy, too.

I offered to help cook, but Edward refused. Feeling useless, I busied myself by unloading the dishwasher. We moved around the kitchen with ease, like a choreographed dance. Every now and then, we'd pinch, swat, or steal kisses from one another. It was a perfect Sunday. Then, I saw the old photo album on the table. It had been moved from where I had placed it. My wart constricted with worry. I ran my hand over it.

"Thank you for removing it from the barn," He said from stove. I didn't turn to face it. Very quickly I opened the back of it to see the picture of him and Tanya. It was gone. I crossed my eyebrows in confusion, but decided not to say anything. He got rid of it, and I was happy with that.

"You're welcome," I replied, turning to him with a smile. "Your parents and grandparents were beautiful."

"Yes, the were," He told me wistfully. "My grandparents died of old age. When they left the house to me, my father was furious. Jealous, too. Sadly, they died when I was a teenager on a business trip. Plane crash."

"That's terrible," I whispered sadly. He nodded his head.

"I'm not alone anymore, though," He said brightly. I smiled.

"No, never again."

Finally seated at the small table located in my breakfast nook, we began to eat. The food was divine. Everything meshed perfectly together. Edward finished first, then got us two glasses of milk. I thanked him for my full stomach. Still in my robe, I decided to use that to my advantage. I stood up and walked over to him. He was seated comfortably in his chair and watched me with suspicious eyebrows. I smiled as sexy as I could.

"What are you doing?" He asked through a thick voice.

"Thanking you," I replied shrugging my shoulders. I offered my hands to him, which he took. Pulling him upward, I let go of this hands and went to his waistband pulling them down. I took a deep breath for courage and to remain as sexy as possible. His pants fell to his ankles, springing his erection free. He was right about what he had said earlier. Dim light did us unjustly. His most intimate part was more beautiful than I could have imagined. Very lightly, I placed a small secret kiss to the head of his penis. It throbbed beneath my lips. I couldn't help the smile that spread across my face. I took his full length into my mouth.

"Bella," He gasped. I sucked as hard yet as soft as I could for a long minute feeling every groove of him on my tongue. His breathing picked up, but just before I allowed him to finish, I stopped. He looked at me in a pleasure filled haze. I pushed on his shoulders telling him to sit back down, which he did easily. I untied my robe letting it fall open. His hands instantly went to cup my small breasts. I loved his touch. I parted my legs and sat on top of him, hovering over his excited piece. He massaged my breasts and bent his head to lick one of my hard nipples. I gasped and lowered myself onto him fully. I pushed with my feet to move me up and down. That perfect feeling of pleasure returned to by body full force. His hands moved all over my back and he kissed my freckled shoulders over and over again. I was close to my release when he stopped me by putting his hands on my hips.

"Let's go upstairs," He suggested in a raspy tone.

"You don't want to do it here?" I asked worriedly.

"I want to do it on and against every square inch of this house, but those sapphire sheets are calling to me. Afterwards, maybe we can do it again in the shower?" He was too sweet and adorable to say no to. I nodded my head briskly. His hands moved from my hips to under my butt, lifting me as he stood. We stayed locked together, moaning in pleasure by the movement as he carried us up to bed.

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**Lemons, lemons, lemons.**

**Review, guys! :D**


	10. Chapter 9

**Because Monday's generally suck ;)**

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**Chapter 9:**

**Love**

Everyone in the world hates Monday's. My hatred for the first day of the week was with a burning passion. Monday meant work, and work meant leaving Edward. Although, I was pretty sore from all of the love making that took place. I smiled to myself. At least the day was half way over, and I had plenty to do to keep me busy. The amphitheater would be finished any day now, so we were able to move on to a new project. Jacob had a lot of great things in mind.

Mostly, I wondered about what Edward was doing. I offered the house for him to stay at for the day, but he opted not to, explaining that he had a few things to take care of. That is what preoccupied my mind. He made no move to mention what those few things might be, and my stupid insecurities had returned full force in his absence. What if he went to see Tanya? I had not heard from him all day. I desperately wanted to text him, but I didn't want to scare him off. He needed space to be home for the first time in over half a year, and a clingy girl was the last thing he would want. I frowned upon my stupid myself. All of a sudden, my best friend popped into my mind. I grabbed my cell and dialed her number. School let out at three, and I was at the office until five. I cursed looking at the clock. It was only 2:45. I tossed my phone down in frustration. Suddenly, it vibrated, scaring me half to death. I grabbed the device with my other hand clutching my chest.

"Penelope!" I addressed thankfully.

"Bella?" My eyes went wide. I smacked my forehead.

"Edward, I'm sorry. I didn't even bother to look at the caller ID.

"It's okay," He replied laughing. "How is your day?"

"Long," I droned. "You?"

"Great! I just signed the papers to open my new practice."

"Oh, that is wonderful!" I cheered.

"Yeah, it feels good. I open the doors January fifth. I was actually calling for a favor?"

"Oh?" I asked piqued.

"The office needs some renovating... I wasn't sure if you'd be interested." I smiled warmly. He was nervous asking me, and it was cute.

"I would love to. Bring the blueprints home tonight. I mean," I coughed awkwardly. "If you decide to come to my house tonight, or I mean-"

"Bella baby, calm down," He said chuckling. "I would love to come home to you. I just didn't want to over stay my welcome." It was my turn to chuckle.

"No, I want you there.

"Good, because I would have been on the streets if you had opposed. And it is cold as fuck outside." I laughed again.

"Forecast is calling for more snow... Maybe we'll get snowed in!" I said excitedly.

"Here's to hoping, baby. I'll see you after work, okay?"

"Okay," I replied dreamily. We got off of the phone, and I was ready to return to work. This time, with a smile.

By the time the day was over, it found me in the lunch room at the office refilling my thermo with hot chocolate. It would keep me warm and I had been drinking it all day. I pulled the hot milk out of the microwave carefully.

"You got a sec?" Jacob's voice boomed, startling me. Milk sloshed onto my hand burning it.

"Shit!" I hissed.

"Aw, fuck. I'm sorry, Bella." Jacob grabbed a towel and handed it to me dutifully.

"It's alright. It wouldn't have been a complete day without me getting hurt in some way," I teased.

"At least it wasn't your nose," He replied laughing. I never would forget the black and broken nose that Jacob gave me my first week with the firm. Of course, technically it was my fault for running down the hall. If only I had been walking, maybe Jacob's sudden door opening wouldn't have blackened my face. My colleagues called me raccoon eyes for a year.

"Ha, ha. So, what's up?" I asked, retuning to my task.

"My wife and I are planning a Christmas party opening for the amphitheater this Friday. What do you say?" I thought about it for a moment.

"Sure, sounds fun. Can I bring date?"

"You?" He faked disbelief.

"You just think you're so fucking funny, don't you?" I was always glad to have this silly banter with Jacob since he was my boss. He flirted with me a lot in the beginning, but finally took the hint that I thought of him as an older brother. I was so glad to hear that he got married. Unfortunately, I was on a trip to D.C. with Penelope on his wedding day, so I missed it. I had always wanted to meet Mrs. Black.

"Are you trying to make me jealous?" His tone was serious. Looking down to my thermo closing the lid, my eyebrows crossed in confusion. I slowly turned to look at him.

"What?"

"You heard me," He said smirking in a very unattractive way. I was completely stumped.

"Um..." Was all I was able to force out of my mouth. Jacob moved in closer. Then, even closer until his mouth was mere inches away from me.

"Just kidding!" He yelled. He punched my arm and backed away. I gave an awkward laugh and rubbed my now sore arm.

"Here's your invite, by the way," He said nonchalantly. I took the red envelope from him silently. So much for brotherly, I thought disgusted. He left when his cell phone rang and I was able to get out to my car quickly.

"Welcome home," Edward addressed sweetly, kissing my forehead. I closed the front door and removed my coat.

"Hi," I replied happily. The house smelt of fresh steak and potatoes. Edward handed me a glass of wine, which I took quickly.

"It smells amazing," I said sniffing the air again.

"I'm glad you think so." Before I could walk to the kitchen, Edward took hold of my waist and pulled me towards him. He hugged me tightly. I lifted my head to look at him smiling. He kissed me softly, and released me. He walked into the kitchen, leaving me in adaze.

"What was that for?" I asked, coming up to the counter.

"I missed you today."

"You're just the sweetest fucking guy ever, you know that?" He raised his eyebrows playfully.

"Oh, am I?"

"You give amazing head, you cook, and you tell me that you miss me." He smiled and shrugged his shoulders.

"I wanted to call you all day," I admitted shyly.

"Why didn't you?"

"Clingy isn't a very attractive trait." He huffed.

"Call me always. Text me, too. I love words." He somehow looked more attractive than he did yesterday, which I thought was impossible. His jeans hung low and his dark sweater hugged him in all the right places. He was barefoot, and that turned me on for some unknown reason.

"Yes, I know," I said, inching closer to him. He turned the burners off and sighed happily. I heard the TV in the background all of a sudden. My eyebrows raised in surprise as I set my wine glass down.

"Have you been watching my show?" I asked laughing. I leaned to the right to see my flat screen, and sure enough, Mariska Hargitay's face could be seen. He laughed embarrassed. I walked over to him and wrapped my arms around his chest. With my chin propped on his torso, I looked into his beautiful golden eyes.

"What do you say we christen the couch..." I hedged.

"Mmm, I thought you would never ask," He growled. Before I could turn to lead him, he picked me up in his arms. I cried out in laughter.

Thoughts of Edward and I having sex filled my mind. I must have dozed off after our sex on the couch. I decided to think about it more, not wanting to open my eyes just yet. We did at least five different positions. My favorite, and I think his, too was when he bent me over. I had never done it any other way than missionary style. I heard movement on the wood floor and opened my eyes to see Edward looking at my things that lined the fire place mantle.

"You started a fire?" I asked sleepily. I sat up on the couch and stretched. Edward had out his boxers back on, but was bare everywhere else.

"Yeah, it's pretty, huh?"

"Very," I replied trough a yawn. "What time is it?"

"Only ten at night. What is this award for?" He picked up a large crystal ball that had my name engraved on it.

"Architect of the year."

"Impressive. What about all these other awards?"

"Various awards from school or work. I'm beginning to run out of room," I chuckled. "By the way, that reminds me," I began nervously, "Would you come to my firm's Christmas party on Friday?"

"I'd love to," He replied honestly.

"Thanks."

"Bella, what are we doing?" His question threw me off. My thumb instantly went to my mouth to chew on and the blanket overtop of me became too warm.

"I care about you a lot," I whispered. "And I don't do flings."

"So, that makes this important to you then?" He still had not turned to look at me.

"Yes. What do you think?"

"I care more than a lot for you," He admitted quietly, almost as if it were to himself. My heart lifted.

"I can't imagine being without you, Edward." He finally turned to look at me with a wide smile across his face.

"You don't ever have to be." He walked over to me and sat on the edge of the couch. Slowly, he pulled the blanket down to reveal my bare chest. My body shivered slightly. Edward looked into my eyes for a moment before bending down to kiss the bare spot between my breasts.

"I'm afraid," He croaked.

"Of?"

"Of caring so much. The last woman I loved left me." He grew silent, pondering. "Although, I wouldn't of care for you so quickly if I had loved her at all."

"All I can do to reassure you, Edward is to stay true. All I can do is be me. And I'm not the type to chest or lie." His crooked smile appeared, easing my aching heart.

"I can be selfish," He whispered against my chest, "And my selfish side wants your forever."

"That's not selfish," I explained sweetly, "That is love." He looked up to me now with his eyes twinkling.

"Love," He repeated wondrously. We sealed our agreement with a passionate kiss that I felt could never end. Although, deep down, something was stirring between us. We would have to face a few demons, I knew.

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**Loving all these story favorites and alerts. Thank you guys!**


	11. Chapter 10

**Sunday updates rule. I wanted to give a day or two after the amazing release of BD2 before I posted again.**

**So without further adieu, I give you Chapter 10!**

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**Chapter 10:**

**Sooner or Later**

Friday evening was upon us. The week flew by with no mishaps, a lot of sex, and a lot of winter storm warnings. If the snow hadn't of let up Thursday afternoon, Jacob would have cancelled the Christmas party. I was glad that he did not, however. I wanted Edward to see my work environment, and rumors around the office hinted at me winning another award. It was a very satisfying thing in my profession: to have your form of art recognized.

Edward dressed wonderfully in a black suit. He was fancy, yet comfortable. I liked that he opted out on a tie of sorts. He was too sexy for his own good. It was almost intimidating. I on the other hand dressed as nice as I was capable. My hair fell in long soft curls and my make up was done tastefully. I chose a satin emerald dress that went just above my knees. Actually, Edward chose the dress. He said that it attributed to my best feature, that being my ass. I laughed embarrassed, but took the compliment to heart. I felt pretty because he saw me as pretty.

Lately we had been all hands and no talk, which didn't seem to bother either of us. We were in that beginning stage of new love where the curiosity of one another's bodies overruled everything else. He made me see myself in a new way, a way that I liked. Everything he did was sexual to me. It was taking everything I had not to lean over the center console and unzip his pants. Strangely, I didn't feel weird for thinking that way.

"What are you staring at?" Edward asked smiling.

"Your crotch," I admitted sheepishly. Saying such things out loud was a different story, of course.

"It's all yours," He teased.

"Ha, maybe on the way home," I replied as sexily as I could.

"Tease," He scoffed, faking hurt. I smiled wider and took his hand which he held tightly.

The amphitheater looked perfect. I was extremely proud of my coworkers and myself for our hard work. I also wanted desperately to find whoever did the interior design because it was beautiful. It had an old classic look to it. Edward and I strolled in, hand in hand, happily. As we entered the main hall that was decked out in Christmas decorations, I felt him tense up. I was about to ask why before I was bombarded with coworkers to talk of our work, and demanding to be introduced to my date. Edward kept a straight face, smiled when needed, and shook everyone's hand politely. He would speak of his work and his new office opening downtown, but he was frigid. I could tell, and it was making me uncomfortable. Trying to distract myself from Edward's mood, I sought out Jacob, but had no luck. I knew he would be speaking, and when the lights dimmed, we all took our seats. Dinner was served with endless amounts of champagne. Edward was silent. His eyes searched the room frantically. Suddenly, the steak, potatoes and asparagus in front of me didn't seem so appealing.

"Welcome," Jacob announced. All eyes trained to the stage to see our boss in a white suit that only made his skin spear darker. His red tie shined from the overhead lights. I tried paying attention to his words but I couldn't. Something felt off besides Edward acting strange. I tried studying his frozen face again for answers when something broke my attention.

"And the award goes to, Bella Swan!" Jacob called. All of a sudden, a searchlight was trained on me. My cheeks went crimson and I staggered in standing upright to make my way to the stage. Edward did not even look to me, nor clap. The applause was too loud, ringing in my ears. I walked up and took Jacob's outstretched hand to shake it. He leaned in to my ear.

"Congrats. You're the best this firm has ever seen," He whispered kindly. My smile finally made an appearance in appreciation.

"Bella's plaque is running late," Jacob said through the microphone with a chuckle. The audience laughed, too. It was impossible to see Edward through the strobe lights. That made me even more uneasy.

"Bella, do you have anything to say?" All the blood left my body. I leaned into the microphone and cleared my throat.

"If it weren't for all of you, I would not be here. Thank you." I backed away as another round of applause sounded. Finally, the presentations ended and I went in search for Edward, dodging everyone that I could. Fear pricked at my neck when I couldn't find him. The crowd broke and I saw him at the bar. I jogged over to him, almost tripping in my high heels twice. As soon as my hand touched his arm, I heard my name being called yet again.

"Bella!" I turned to see Jacob coming through the crowd pulling someone along with him whose face was hidden behind many others. I kept my hand on Edward as Jacob approached me.

"So sorry about your award," He began, handing me my plaque, "They spelt Bella wrong, so I had an emergency fix. Whoever can misspell Bella is a fucking joke," He said with a laugh. I forced a smile.

"Thanks," I replied kindly. Before I could finally turn around to my date, Jacob tugged on the hand he was holding to reveal the person that would shock my heart into cardiac arrest.

"I don't think you have met my wife yet, Tanya Black." Tanya swiveled around and studied me for a moment before offering her hand.

"Hi, I don't believe we have met," She said smiling widely.

"She did all of the interior design," Jacob said proudly. Tanya smiled embarrassed. She looked to him with large puppy eyes. My stomach grew nauseous.

"Hi," I whispered. I shook her hand slowly, my chin on the floor.

"You look strangely familiar," She said with a laugh and furrowed eyebrows. She studied my face. I hesitated in answering out of fear, but it just appeared rude.

"Yeah, I, uh..." Just then, Edward turned around, dropping my hand from his forearm. My wrist bone slammed against a bar stool painfully. It was Tanya's turn to be shocked, and shocked she was. She coughed on her own spit. All of a sudden, everything fell into its place harshly. My mind was wrapped up in a whirlwind at first until someone hit the brakes. The four of us stood there motionless, speechless, awkward. Unfortunately, the tension was full of more than just awkwardness. It was deceit, hurt, and longing all in one package being delivered to all of us at the same time. I began watching my boyfriend carefully, painfully.

"Edward," Jacob said. His voice was a lot more friendly than I thought it would be. He seemed surprised. Relieved even. It confused me greatly.

"Jacob," Edward addressed curtly. His eyes went to Tanya who still stood frozen in horror. "Tanya," He said through clenched teeth. His eyes went to her pregnant stomach and nearly bolted out of his head. He looked to Jacob, then back to her. Not once, did he even notice my standing here. My heart fell to the floor, switching places with my slack jaw. Suddenly, Tanya ran from us as fast as her pregnant body would allow.

"Tanya!" Jacob called.

"I'll handle it, thanks," Edward growled. He took off after her leaving me and my boss to ourselves. I didn't bother calling after Edward. My voice for him was lost, much like my heart.

"Well, that was awkward," Jacob said laughing again. Anger began to brew within me. I quickly spun around to the bartender and ordered two vodka shots, downing one after the other. My throat lit on fire.

"Whoa, slow down, Bella," Jacob said worriedly. I rolled my eyes at him, still unable to find my voice. I was screaming inside. I ordered two more shots, taking them quicker than the first. Jacob came closer, putting himself between me and a bare barstool.

"What the fuck was that?" I asked hoarsely.

"You're dating him?" Jacob asked. His voice was laced with annoyance.

"You fucked his girlfriend?" I shot back. Jacob flinched. He raised his hands in defense.

"Uh, no. He wasn't coming home. And they were broken up."

"So! He was your best friend," I yelled. Jacob looked around us embarrassed. I didn't bother to look and see who was now watching us and listening in. The vodka was making me feel better quickly.

"Things change," Jacob whispered, leaning in closer to me. "Please, keep it down." He looked around again, faking a large smile.

"The heart wants what the heart wants, Bella." I slammed my shot glass down on the bar. I tried to think before I spoke. If I had, my subconscious would have told me to just walk away instead of sitting here downing alcohol like water, and cussing out my boss. Vodka didn't care, so I made no move to leave. Vodka wouldn't have to pay the consequences.

"What about all those times you hit on me, huh?" I slurred. "You are married! Jesus, no wonder your house looked familiar. I fucking drew it up for you!"

"Bella, I haven't done anything wrong here," He defended quietly.

"Oh, no?" I replied. "Prove it." Jacob moved the stool out from between us and stood next to me. The hairs on my neck were standing at attention.

"He left. They were broken up. Maybe it was too soon for her and I to get together, but we did. There was no shame in that. That didn't break up my friendship with Edward. Tanya and I were sleeping together well before they broke up, and that is my only regret. But she didn't know what or who she wanted. When Edward announced that he was leaving, her choice became known to her. It was me all along." What he was telling me made no sense. The vodka was turning against me. The only reason I cared about Jacob's sliminess was because it hurt the man I so deeply cared for. When really, my caring would change nothing. I looked down to my pretty plaque. My name was embroidered deep in the gold seal. I smiled sadly before pushing it away from me and towards Jacob. Without a reply, I turned and walked away from my boss.

"I'm calling you a cab!" Jacob yelled. His voice drifted away with each step I took.

The crowd was thicker than before as people had begun to dance. Loud music wafted through the large room, closing all open space. I stumbled a lot before finding my way out into the empty halls. I was alone. Not even vodka would be kind in keeping my company, now. When new voices became known, I slowed my drunken walk. I listened intently and stopped behind the corner before making the turn. I peered my head around to find Edward and Tanya in front of the foyer Christmas tree. The sight of the two beauties hurt more than I thought my body could withstand. There wasn't much left of me. The hardest part was admitting to myself that this was partly my fault as well. I should have told Edward everything I had found out. Maybe, I should let them be. Maybe... Sadly, they are meant to be. My eyes saw Edward's face illuminated by small Christmas tree lights. It was shattering my soul.

"Is it mine?" Edward asked through tears. Tanya looked down ashamed.

"Yes. No. I don't know," She admitted quietly. Edward ran a hand through his hair, pulling hard on the ends.

"Well, we're going to find that out fucking ASAP." Tanya only nodded her response.

"Fuck you for this. You did this!" Edward yelled. Tanya cowered even lower until finally, she broke. Sobs racked her chest. Her pregnant breasts moved thickly with the crying and her mascara ran down her face. I wanted to feel bad for her, but I felt nothing but hate. She would take him away from me.

"I'm sorry," She cracked, "I always loved you! Please," She begged. She stepped toward him, throwing herself into his arms. If he hadn't of caught her, she would have fallen to the ground. I took this moment to run. I tripped as soon as my heels hit the tile floor, falling right at Edward's feet. My knees and elbow burned. I gathered myself up, my dress torn and one shoe missing.

"Bella!" Edward cried. He released Tanya, but she would not let go of him. Her eyes burned a hole through my chest, looking down to me with a covered smirk. I stood up and backed away as fast as I could. Time was passing us like lightening. The vodka almost had me trip again. I bent to grab my shoe and saw blood running down my leg. I looked up to Edward who's eyes mirrored my own sadness. I made sure he did not get the chance to try and speak to or touch me. Without a word, I ran outside in one heel knowing that Edward's eyes followed me. The night air was freezing, soothing my open wounds. Snow melted against my hot cheeks. Jacob held true to his word when I spotted a cab on the street waiting.

The cab was warm and inviting. If only I would allow that to overtake me. I began to call out my address but stopped. I gave the woman driver Penelope's address instead. She would save me. Someone had to. I was broken. Not even nightmares would keep me company tonight. I laid my head back on the seat and closed my eyes, forcing out all images of Edward. A quiet song played through the speakers. I focused on it entirely. It spoke to me.

_Somebody, somewhere turns off the lights_

_Somebody all alone faces the night_

_You got to be strong_

_When you're out on your own_

_'Cause sooner or later_

_We all sleep alone_

_Nobody, nowhere holds the key to your heart_

_When love's a possession it'll tear you apart_

_You may have lovers wherever you roam_

_But sooner or later_

_We all sleep alone_

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**_I _****hope all of you who have, and hate yet too, enjoy Breaking Dawn Part 2. It was superb. A perfect ending. Luckily, it is forever, yeah? :)**

**Review please! **


	12. Chapter 11

**With Thanksgiving the day after tomorrow (I cannot believe it!) I decided to post now, because I know everyone will begin to get hectic with the holiday! Happy ending! :)**

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**Chapter 11:**

**Found**

My body was warm. My insides were cold. I searched for the warmth that my cold desperately needed. It was not next to me. It was nowhere to be found. Had I not dreamt everything? All of a sudden, I grew fearful. Where was I? My head hurt. My knees hurt. The last image I had was of burning gold eyes. I never wanted to hear my name called again. That was hoping for too much.

"Bella," Penelope asked softly. Of course. I came here instead of going home. I grunted out loud.

"Wake up." I grunted again and rolled over. My eyes opened and were met with pink. Mae's room. My wits returned to me quickly. I sat up, embarrassed and confused.

"Penelope, hi," I said. My throat was dry. She handed me a tall glass of water. I took it and drank half of it down. It cooled the flames in my throat.

"How are you feeling?" Penelope asked softly. She sat in a chair next to Mae's large bed. Pink everything was everything. Black, too.

"I'm so sorry I came here," I began.

"Don't be. You were pretty messed up."

"Yeah," I said ashamed. "I took quite a few shots."

"No, you weren't that drunk."

"Oh?" I squeaked.

"You cried." My cheeks heated.

"A lot?" I whispered.

"A lot." She repeated. I threw my head in my hands. My hair tangled in my hands. It was knotted. "Oh, God. What has happened," I asked, mostly to myself. "Everything was so good. Then, at the party, all the pieces that had been floating around in the air dropped and pieced together perfectly." I looked down to see my emerald dress, torn, and stained.

"Nice analogy," Penelope said smiling.

"But what exactly happened?"

"Tanya... She's Jacob's wife!" I cried. It hurt as much as it felt good to say it all out loud. "And Jacob was Edward's best friend."

"Jeez, what a soap opera." I glared at her. "Sorry, sorry. Then what happened?"

"Tanya and Edward took off. I was stuck with Jacob, so I kept drinking. I went to leave and found Edward with her in the foyer. They were arguing... They hugged. I tripped. I left. That's it."

"Hmm," Penelope sounded. I rubbed my head.

"What time is it?"

"Noon. Your phone has gone off a few times." She held her hand out to me. My iPhone stared at me. Tentatively, I took it. I had two missed calls. One from Edward and one from... Jacob? A few alerts, another winter storm warning. One text message from Edward.

_Please call me. Where are you? -E_

I tried to smile, but couldn't. I lifted the phone to show Penelope.

"He cares," She whispered. I shrugged my shoulders.

"You have some clothes here. I put them and a towel in the bathroom. We can figure things out over coffee when you get out." I nodded my head.

"Thanks." Penelope smiled and patted my hand.

Have you ever stared at yourself in the mirror, and noticed that you saw no one familiar? That was me. I looked different. My naked body was possessed. I had open wounds on my knees and elbow. My hair was a mess and my make up was smeared. It was the look my eyes had that were most unknown to me. Broken, empty, hollow, dark, and cold. I shivered. I picked up my phone from the counter and opened a new text to Edward.

_I am fine. -B_

I wanted to say so much more, but what? Would anything help or change what was happening? I sighed, hit send, and got into the steam of the shower. I hoped to wash away all that my body had come to know.

"Feel better?" Penelope asked as I came into the kitchen.

"Actually, yes, a little. My head is clearer."

"Good. You've lost weight."

"What?"

"Those clothes. They used to fit you." I looked down to my now very baggy t-shirt and jeans. I shrugged my shoulders and went to the table. I picked up my fresh cup of coffee and took a big drink. It was so soothing. My phone vibrated in my pocket. I very reluctantly took it out to open Edward's reply message.

_Where are you? We need to talk. -E_

Before I could start typing, a call from Jacob interrupted me. Penelope sat at the table and looked to me expectantly.

"Hello?" I answered briskly.

"Bella? Oh, good, you're alive."

"Uh, yeah. Thanks for the cab," I replied.

"I'm glad you're all right. Have you seen Edward?" His voice was frantic with worry.

"No."

"Well Tanya is gone!" He cried. My eyebrows crossed hard in confusion.

"What do you mean, gone?"

"I mean, I never saw her after last night. She didn't come home."

"I don't know where she is, Jacob," I replied truthfully. "Nor do I really care." Jacob sighed heavily.

"Bella, she's very pregnant. Anything could have happened. Help me! Give me Edward's number. I know she's with him."

"Fine, I'll text it to you." If I still possessed heart, it would have ached. All my body had left was anger. Of course he was with her. Even though he was texting me.

"By the way, I quit."

"Find," Jacob said. I almost hung up but he spoke again, stopping me. "And for the record, the baby is mine." I paused trying to process his statement. Words from Tanya's argument with Edward flooded through me like a tidal wave against the shore line. I hung up the phone. Before turning to Penelope, I text Jacob Edward's number and went back to my reply message. My fingers moved fast with furry.

_Tell Tanya that her husband is looking for her. -B_

I hit send. My hand gripped my phone tightly before slamming it down on the table.

"Tanya said to Edward that she wasn't sure who's baby she was carrying."

"It can't be Edward's," Penelope defended

"Oh no? She was fucking Jacob throughout her entire relationship with Edward," I growled.

"I'm sure they'll do a paternity test. I'm surprised that in this day and age, she went without birth control." Suddenly, a lightbulb in my head shinned brightly.

"Wait, Edward told me that he had never had sex without a condom..."

"Well there you go," Penelope said smiling. My chest lifted, then fell again.

"He loves her, Penelope. Those letters, and all the years he knew and wanted her? I cannot compete with that." My phone vibrated. I looked at it quickly.

_I know... I just dropped her off with him. -E_

Furry scorched through me again.

_She was with you all night?! -B_

I had never experienced anger so strongly before, but did I even have a right to be so?

"Bella, if you care about him, you're going to have to face all of this," Penelope ordered.

"I don't know if I can."

"It is not about if you can. If you love him, you will." I looked into her green eyes searching for a way out, knowing she would never give me one. She was strong.

"We'll see," I said softly. "Hey, how was your date with Ben?" Penelope smiled widely.

"We're going out again next weekend."

"I'm so glad," I replied genuinely. It felt good to smile for her. Again, my phone sounded.

_Let me explain, Bella. Please. I need you. -E_

I sighed.

"You'll figure all of this out, Bella. You're smart, and you know what your heart wants. Don't give up on that," Penelope said softly.

_I'll meet you at the house in thirty minutes. -B_

I hit send feeling powerful.

"You think that cab service will serve me again?" I asked laughing. Penelope smiled.

"Oh, yeah."

Christmas lights welcomed me home as I came down the driveway. My tree really did look beautiful through the living room windows. It gave me hope. Edward's car was in the driveway. I payed the cab fare and ran to my door, bolting inside trying to escape the blizzard. Music wafted over. I removed my coat and walked into the living room. Edward stood up from the couch abruptly.

"Bella," He said. He looked extremely tired. Large circles had formed underneath his golden eyes.

"Did you sleep?" I asked sadly. He bowed his head.

"No."

"Where did you go?"

"I came here." He shoved his hands through his hair.

"With Tanya?"

"No," He shouted. I flinched. "No," He said again, softer. "I only went and got her from her parents to bring her back to Jacob. She apologized profusely. She loves Jacob. I never will nor have any wish to see her again."

"Oh. And I quit my job." He looked worried. I shrugged.

"I'll manage." An awkward silence broke out between us. I slowly walked over to the burning fire. It helped warm my cold bones significantly.

"Bella, I-"

"Edward," I said, cutting him off, "If you love her, then that is who you should be fighting for." I turned to face him. He looked at me hurt, then bowed his head again.

"When I saw her again, I thought I did," He admitted truthfully. My chest began its aching. This was it, I thought. I tried to be strong. My eyes closed tight in preparation.

"But, then I saw you," He whispered. My eyes opened slowly. I was unsure if I had heard him correctly or not.

"The baby is not mine." We both seemed to breath a sigh of relief.

"Bella, you saved me. You have to know that. My heart knows love because of you." Tears choked me from answering him. Very slowly, he began stepping towards me. He took my hands and kissed them, forcing tears to fall down my cheeks.

"Edward, I love you so much," I admitted. It was through a hoarse voice, but it was strong. He pulled me to his chest and sighed easily.

"I love you, more, Bella. So much more." My arms wrapped around him securely. "I'm so sorry I left you like that."

"I forgive you. I'm sorry I didn't tell you everything about Tanya." He tightened his hold on me.

"You are the best Christmas present," I said smiling. We pulled apart but didn't let go.

"How about I let you unwrap me?" He had that crooked smile. I took his hand, and he took my heart. The music he had playing could be heard again. We kneeled in front of the fire. I moved to kiss him, but he pulled back, moving to my ear instead. He sang the song lyrics from deep within him.

_I won't give up on us_

_Even if the skies get rough_

_I'm giving you all my love_

_I'm still looking up_

This is where we would begin. All the small things were just technicalities, now. This is where I became found. We would live happily ever after in our house. Everything I possessed became his. He was entirely mine. It started with some letters, and became our own novel that we would write together.

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**The song is, I Won't Give Up, by Jason Mraz. So pretty. Anyway, THERE'S THE ENDING! What did you think?!**

**I know a lot of you added me to your author alert, so I highly encourage you to check out my new story, Diamonds. Thanks for the reviews and love. It means the world to me!**

**each new story I do seems to be loved more than the last, and that means that I am getting better at writing. Thanks for reading my smut and go check out Diamonds! :D**


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